Is it too early to text a guy to see if he still wants to hang out this afternoon(ish)?

Text him, a simple "hey" would work. Give him time to respond, if there is no response in a timley manner then you can say something like "just wondering if we are still on for tonight". Then really ask you can do is wait. And my suggestion, if he does give you the alcohol poisoning bit again, hes not worth the time of day.